animaldads

The National Wildlife Federation has published a clever little article about selected fathers in the animal kingdom that it finds exemplary. I'm not sure I concur with all their criteria for "good" fathers, but it's a cool article.

In a similar vein, Rev. Susan took the Kierkegaardian approach to discussing fathersday by retelling a lesser-known part of the Abraham story from Genesis, before Isaac is even conceived, where Abram (still a young man, not yet a patriarch) has to do some violent, rough business in order to make a serious deal with a major authority figure, having lasting consequences for his people. She called it the yang that completes the yin of the emotionally present, nurturing father. I appreciated that.

Despite the need for the softening of the definition of fatherhood that has taken place in the last 150 years, there is still stern stuff involved in being the dad. I'll try to avoid oversimplification and just say a good father works in all seven chakras, from brutal survival through providing materially, imparting power, caring, nurturing, communicating a voice and a vision, and something else again that shall go nameless because I don't know what to call it.

Gven and I watched almost at random - I swear it wasn't planned, the DVD was just sitting there - a fine movie by Barry Levinson called "Liberty Avenue" Saturday night with beautiful performances by Joe Montegna, Bebe Neuwirth, Adrian Brody, and a couple of young actors whose names I don't recall. It's a coming-of-age story about two brothers set against the backdrop of their father's business problems in multi-racial, multi-cultural Baltimore, circa 1954. In short, they're all learning to deal with being Jews and getting along with the goy power structure, proud assimilating blacks, proud street blacks, each other, antisemitism, racism, and McCarthyism. Dad (Montegna) comes across as a smart, tough-as-nails businessman who goes to temple, likes to dance, drives a brand new Cadillac, demands (and shows) respect.

So don't give me no Hallmark Card strong but gentle Disneyfied father figure, and don't give me no sanitized always there for me nurturing wildlife stud who stands by protecting the eggs while the mama lizard goes out with the girls. We're all animals, and some of us are animaldads, and I'd rather not idealize the breed.